Happy (Belated) Halloween

 So, yes I know it is November, but let's be honest, I'm very rarely on top of things these days, so I'm only getting around to posting about Halloween now. Sorry! I promise all the cute pics will be worth it though!

So last year Eli was only about 7 months old for Halloween, so there was no trick-or-treating to be had. Also, he had a 6 month sleep regression for a few months and I was getting NO sleep, which meant I had no energy to do anything fun for Halloween. I think I threw him into a vampire costume for 5 mins, he puked on it, then on me, then it was bedtime. Or something like that.

This year I was determined to actually do something, so I bought his little costume in advance, had a wreath on our door, and a pumpkin on our front step. (Uncarved, because, I mean, small steps).

Wee Plum made THE cutest little pumpkin ever, if I do say so myself. My mom happened to be in town, and she decided I had to dress up too so we rooted through her suitcase and I managed to put together some kind of gypsy/fortune teller/pirate concoction. We did well. Also, my mom has weird clothes.

My friend Sarah and her little man came over to join us for the trick or treating, and the two boys running around together with their little bags of sweets was just so adorable I couldn't stop laughing. We made it to a good handful of houses, and of course at each one Eli wanted to walk straight into their house and make himself at home (that is going to be a problem in the future) and then he got tired towards the end so I had to carry him everywhere. It was a lot of fun though! Poor Eli didn't get any of his sweets unfortunately, they're very bad for his wee teeth of course, so poor mom and dad had to take one for the team and eat them all. Sorry Eli!

And with that, I will leave you with some adorable pics of the plum himself! Hope all of you had a great Halloween!

Eli decided this was a one-man photo shoot, thank you very much, and did not want me in the picture.

Some Thoughts on 21st Century Wife Life

I went out to dinner with some girlfriends from church a few weeks ago, and it was lovely. Now, the end of the table I was sitting at just happened to have two women at it, both married, both with newborn babies. These girls are good friends of mine, and we were chatting about all the mommy and marriage stuff and after a while, it was brought up how our friends outside of church are just nowhere near the marriage or baby stage yet. It was such a great comfort to be able to talk about this stuff with girls my age that I hadn't realized how isolated I feel the other 6 days a week when I'm not in church.

Getting married at 23 and becoming a mother at 24, I am in the minority here in this country. The average age of grooms in Ireland last year was 34.7 years, while the average age of brides was 32.6. I was almost a decade younger than the average when I got married. And, at the best of times, it kind of makes me feel like a freak. 


Like I was saying with the girls at our dinner the other night, being a 21st century woman with 20th century values is isolating. Now, don't get me wrong - I have a high regard for the value and worth of an education, a career, etc. I plan on furthering my education in the future. Maybe not my career, because 'focusing on my career' has never held any interest for me. I would do PhD after PhD, but finding fulfillment in a continuously rising income or job title has never really interested me. But (right now) babies and marriage and focusing on a Christ-centered life - that does.

And, at times, it makes me feel like a freak.

To be perfectly honest, I don't even really know where I'm going with this blog post. Not a fecking clue. All I know is, I've been thinking about this topic a heck of a lot the past few days, and I felt like chatting about it. I called this blog Bona Fide Blonde with the intention of being just that - bona fide. Genuine, and with always, truth in everything. So I guess what I'm saying is, I think I just want to lay it all out there, what's on my heart, and how I'm feeling about it. Feeling like a weirdo because I'm married and a mother...what was the point of that? Of allowing myself to feel bad because I'm doing what I feel is, at this point in my life, right for me? I feel so strongly that glorifying God by being as Christ-like a wife and mother as I can be is what I'm meant to be doing right now that I just...thought I'd write about it. (Knowing me, next week I'll be like HELLL NAH I'm an independent woman gon get my careeeeer) BUT, this is, 100%, how I'm feeling right now. For the record - you can glorify God in many, many ways. Mother Teresa never married or had bebes, and look at all the incredible ways she worked in God's name. Glorifying God, I have found, is best done by taking your God-given passions and talents and using them for good, for loveliness, grace, mercy, for kindness and humour and all of those good things that move us deeply.

        I think I spent a lot of my late teens and early twenties trying to please everyone, and doing what I thought I was 'supposed' to do. I based my decisions on what I thought would be the most 'normal' or 'right' thing to do, instead of believing that it was okay to just be me. Just do what I felt would make me happy. I did eventually, move to London and study my dream degree, but it took me 3 years longer than it should have. All because I was living my life based on the fear of what people would think of me if I did the things that I valued, and they didn't.

I know that people are still going to judge me anyway. We all judge, myself included, it's definitely something I struggle with. I think that I'm just finally realizing that they can judge, and not like, and I can not give a flying floop.

I wouldn't change getting married at 23 for a second. In fact, I think every one should get married young, if they are in love and are ready for the commitment. However, I 100% understand that marriage is not for every one, and neither is motherhood. That's ok. I get it. I guess what I'm saying is...it can, at times, be difficult, being a young mom and wife and finding great worth in those roles when every one around you is telling that, in fact, those roles are sub-par and true worth is actually found in the workforce. That's probably true for some people. And that's cool.

Society won't work if all women just stay at home and breed. And it won't work if we all value our careers over motherhood and marriage either. What works is listening to that little voice inside you that knows and feels and understands what you love. I have only just learned that real value, and true self worth, is found in following exactly what your heart tells you to. If that means never getting married, never having kids, or never learning how to cook a roast - that's cool. If that means staying at home and raising 15 kids and having dinner on the table by 5 every evening? That is also cool. If that means having 10 kids and being a good wife and being the first female president and winning a nobel prize all at the same time - cool.

I mean, I definitely think you're missing out if you live a life without getting married. I remember when Colm and I first got married, my Dad skyped us after he had a pint or three, and actually gave us some of the best advice we've ever been given as a married couple. He said, "You guys are going to hurt each other. It's inevitable that you will both make mistakes. But if you can learn to love unconditionally and forgive each other easily, you will find that marriage is one of the most fulfilling and rewarding things you will ever experience in life." And I have found that he is right. But, every one is different. Whatever you feel God is calling you to do, do it. I feel a calling as a wife, as a mother, as a Christian. I feel a calling to help people. I feel a calling to write. I feel a calling to educate myself. I feel a calling to eventually complete my Anthropology degree. I feel a calling to love and be loved. I feel a calling to be and embody and speak truth, always.

Like I was saying earlier, I had no idea where this post was going, but I guess it's ended up with...please, for your sake and every one else's, be the you that you were designed to be. The world will be a better place because of it.  Also, I love being a mom. And a wife. And a big soppy person who writes big soppy blog posts.
Oh dear.

Lots and lots and lots of the love,

Aine.

Hello Bye

I don't know about you guys, but I'm a lady who loves a good deal. As I have afore mentioned, I'm wary of doing a lot of outfit posts, or being referred to as a 'fashion blog' because a) I do not understand the fashion and b) I do not have the dollas for the fashion.

That being said, I'm going to share outfits with you when I find ones that I particularly like or think are a good deal, because we all love a good deal. This top is from Penneys (um, they're A/W collection is awesome) and the pants are on sale atm in River Island. The blush suede mules were only 24 quid from Debenhams (wut). Yay for sales!

Hope every one has a great weekend...and I hope the sun comes out for you all!

And I just had to throw in this one of my boys because ermergerd cute:

10 Things To Do With A Toddler When It's Raining Outside

If you live in place half as freezing, damp, and continuously grey as I do, then you'll know that trying to keep a toddler entertained during those rainy days can be a nightmare. I saw a great list recently sharing some ideas of what to do on those days, and I thought I'd share my own. The below activities are all things I have actually done with Eli to try and keep him entertained. The most obvious thing to do with Eli is put on Peppa Pig...but honestly, I'm trying to limit it to half an hour in the morning and half an hour in the evening, rainy outside or not. I don't like the idea of my son being attached to technology before he even starts going to school, even if it means being wrecked at the end of the day from trying to keep him entertained long enough to stop him from crying while trying to fit his entire head under the couch to get to the laptop (my most common hiding place for it).

10 Technology-Free Things to Do With a Toddler When It's Crappy Outside

1. Bake. I know this seems obvious, but I really didn't think of it until recently. I always choose something reasonably simple, like muffins, brownies, etc. Today we got a little more adventurous and did apple cinnamon squares for breakfast tomorrow morning. Eli is kept entertained, and I get a delicious ready made breakfast tomorrow. Yay! He's still a little young for baking, so I just keep him on my hip, ask him to help me pour the milk/flour/oil into the bowl etc., which he does willingly. Then I get him to stir it while I lightly hold his hand. He loves it. And I love cake.
2. Hang out on mama and papa's bed. Seems boring to us, but Eli looooves it for some reason. The novelty maybe? I dunno. He could literally just hang out and bounce around and mess on our bed for an hour. He has done. I just lie there, we might snuggle, I'll tickle him for a while, or go on my phone while he entertains himself by throwing himself around incessantly.
3. Fill up a handbag with random objects and take them back out again. I feel like this one is pretty self explanatory...
4. Scribble. I picked up a boys' colouring book and some crayons in our local pound shop and just sat down with Eli and helped him scribble. He's so weird, he insists on holding up whatever he's drawing on, while he's drawing. Kid thinks he's Picasso.
5. Do laundry. Yep. Sometimes I just have to get stuff done, and Eli just has to tag along. I give him a pile of 2-3 items that he can mess around with while I fold everything else, and then do his pile last. 
6. Read. Reading is this kid's favourite activity EVER and will attempt to go through every book he owns before finally going to sleep. I have literally memorized a couple off by heart. I wish I was joking.
7. Have a bath together. I usually reserve bath time for right after dinner (because Eli is a savage) and it's nice to have a warm bath before bed, but when you're stuck you're stuck. He loves water, like most kids, and when I'm in there with him he's just never happier. Play with rubber ducks, pour water into different sized containers, etc.
8. Bubbles. You can get 9 bottles of bubbles for 1.49 in Dealz (wuuuut!) , and just GO TO TOWN in your living room. I will never get tired of Eli trying to catch bubbles, no matter how many times he bursts them, he just never learns. 
9. Scrapbook. I'm trying to make family albums organized by year at the moment (yes, I am one of THOSE people), and today I decided to let Eli give me a hand. I gave him a pile of photos I wasn't using yet and just let him look through them, point out Mama or Dada, slide them around on the floor and what have you. He also sat on my lap and looked through the finished product with me, which he loved.
10. Just go outside and get wet anyway. Sometimes, you're just gonna go stir-crazy if you stay within 4 walls for just one. more. second. On those days, I say just go out and get wet and muddy anyway. Kids love that sorta thing. One of the nicest afternoons I've ever had at the park was a few weeks ago, when it was just drizzling miserably all day. Colm, Eli, myself and a friend bought some chips (soaked in salt and vinegar, obviously) and went to the local playground. I kept Eli well wrapped and hooded, and he just had such a blast having the whole playground to himself (no one goes when it's raining) and we just ate our chips and played frisbee in the rain. Lovely.

Elijah Bear Lately

I thought I would do just a quick little post and share some photos of every day life with the wee plum lately. I always love the unplanned, candid photos the most, and they're also a far more accurate portrayal of life in general. This little bean is 16 months this month! Time has flown much, much too fast and seeing this little stinker run around like a proper little person is just the greatest joy. The poor thing is teething really badly at the moment - resulting in major tantrums, uncontrollable crying and refusing to eat anything other than toast or yogurt. I would be seriously lost in the teething process without a) Peppa Pig and b) Calpol! Anyways...enjoy!